I woke up today and stepped on the scale. I weighed 142.3 lb. That’s a number I can live with. Depending on time of day, what I ate the night before, how I slept, and how much water I drink, my weight fluctuates 2-4 lb. I look at this number and no longer see anything over 170 lb.

I used to weigh 170+ lb. How is that possible? It seems like eons ago.

And then I look in the mirror, and see someone who feels familiar and strange all at once. Someone who spends her days sitting at a computer, working on products and design work, layouts and business materials. Someone who would much rather be making breads, pastries, and other foods, cleaning, organizing and writing. Maybe reading (half-way through White Oleander now. Was going to stop and jot it under the “Give up” list on here, but I didn’t want to have a book thrown under there just yet. So I’m sticking it out. It’s getting better…sort of. I think that world is crazy.).

With the recent book purge, I need to be mindful of what books are brought back into the house. No more books like White Oleander please. I can always find room for more cookbooks. I do love the Taste of Home cookbook. I’ve been eyeing the baking version at Barnes and Noble. And there’s an Art of French Baking book that seems intriguing too. It doesn’t have a price on it, so I keep imagining various prices (I DON’T believe it costs $200, but maybe $39.99. Or $59.99…. though that’d be hard to swallow too).

I’ve also been thinking of just..tasks. I would love someone to fix the blue cabinet in my house (it needs a support added to the bottom. Not a big deal). Or I’d like my iPod updated, with new music and playlists (I keep accidentally playing Christmas music because it’s just thrown in with everything). I’d love my car washed. I’d love a coupon voucher for free ironing services. Or maybe a giftcard to the resale shop I am in love with so much (I don’t feel so bad about buying new clothes when they’re 2nd hand!).

Maybe some shoes. As I get older, I notice my feet are pickier and pickier about comfortable shoes. These are okay so far… and made the recent closet purge. I own about 25 pair now. Maybe less. (I used to be up in the 80s!).

And I do realize that shoes like this aren’t conducive to lots of walking, or running, or quick movement. But they ARE cute (Blue suede and patent leather? Sign me up!). I own two pair of tennis shoes and I wonder if that signifies my health in some way.

I’m still trying to figure out how to incorporate more Weight Watchers meetings into my life… trying to track more….be more mindful,…and just balance normal living with healthy ideals. I can’t live like I was when I was on the plan. Things change once you hit goal. But the goal never changes…and that takes up a lot of my thoughts.

But I think they’re all positive thoughts on with that regard. I can always make changes to myself..but I’ve started hanging out with people more, I’m starting to get new friends. I’m trying to make dates with folks and understand that I have enough of my own baggage. I don’t need to carry theirs, too. So, I’ve been trying to spend less time with the perpetually negative folks. The ones who have changed so much in the past few years that I hardly recognize them. It’s not good for them and it’s not good for me.

I’m trying to throw myself more into my blog. These photos are all from my phone, but eventually I’ll have DH take better pics of me. I don’t put myself on here very often. I never really know what to talk about. So since this is the first kind of post like this, bear with me. I’m very glad that tomorrow is Friday! 😀

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